I’ve been to countless retreats, coached hundreds of men, and experienced a wide variety of events and programs all over the world. From weekends in the woods to luxury getaways on the beach, from mountain climbs to sessions led by Navy SEALs, I’ve seen it all. And while these retreats offer powerful moments and incredible experiences, there’s one mistake I see over and over:
People believe these retreats will change their lives.
They spend thousands of dollars, take time away from work and family, and show up expecting that a single weekend will transform everything. They think they’ll leave with the tools, traits, and abilities to finally live the life they’ve always dreamed of.
That’s not how it works.
Yes, you can have a great time. Yes, you can learn valuable lessons, connect with others, and even push yourself in ways you never thought possible. But here’s the truth: you always come home. You return to your life, your routines, and the environment that created the challenges you wanted to escape in the first place.
Despite what everyone says during those final group hugs—“We’re family now! We’ll stay connected forever!”—reality hits. The group text is buzzing the day after the retreat, 50% of the guys are still active by day two, and by the end of the week, the chat is a ghost town. Everyone is back to their lives, wondering why the magic they felt at the retreat didn’t carry over.
Here’s why: You cannot build on an unstable foundation.
Most men approach retreats the wrong way. They think the retreat will fix their problems or create the foundation for the life they want. But a retreat isn’t a shortcut to success—it’s a tool to enhance the success you’ve already started building.
Don’t go to a retreat to change your life. Go to a retreat to support your life.
Before you drop thousands of dollars on a weekend in the woods, invest in yourself where you are. Start with the basics: hire a coach, a trainer, a nutritionist. Create a lifestyle around what success looks like for you in your day-to-day life. Commit to consistency. Build habits. Focus on preparation, discipline, accountability, and routine.
Do this for six months, nine months, a year. Watch your body transform. Feel the difference in your energy, confidence, and clarity. Notice how your relationships, work, and happiness improve. Then, when you’ve established a solid foundation, that’s when you reward yourself with a retreat.
Because now, the retreat isn’t an expense—it’s an investment.
When you’ve put in the work and built the infrastructure for success, the retreat becomes a springboard, not a lifeline. It’s an opportunity to celebrate your progress, to connect with like-minded people, to challenge yourself further, and to return home with insights you can actually apply to a life that’s already moving in the right direction.
So many men want the reward without the work. They chase the shortcut instead of the process. But true transformation isn’t found in a rainforest, on a mountain, or in a circle passing a talking stick. It’s found in the small, consistent actions you take every day.
Let the retreat be the gift you give yourself for the progress you’ve made—not the starting point.
And when you do it this way, it’s not just a weekend. It’s a catalyst for something even greater, because you’re not relying on the retreat to save you. You’re using it to enhance what you’ve already built.
That’s how you maximize the experience—and your life.
In health,
—Greg
