What got you here, isn’t going to get you there…
For years, I had an SOP (a standard operating procedure) for how I lived my days.
It was built around two standards that I still believe in completely:
The first is that I need to exercise every day, and the second is that I need to write every day.
That’s my health. That’s my work.
Those two things anchor everything else in my life.
My school of thought was simple: wake up early, work out, then go win the day and produce creatively. Exercise first. Write later. That was the order. That was the system.
But the thing about a Standard Operating Procedure is that over time they gain inertia. Once you’ve been doing it long enough, it stops being a choice. It becomes “just how you do things.” You start to believe that changing it would mean you’re slipping. Deviating. Falling off your standards.
That belief is wrong.
In fact, it’s dangerous.
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The most dangerous phrase we use on ourselves is, “This is how I’ve always done it.” Because it shuts down growth and wisdom. In this case, it keeps you stuck running an old operating system long after it stops serving you.
So I changed my SOP recently (I’ll get to that in a minute) and the result is that I’m happier, healthier, stronger, more productive, more connected, wealthier in every sense of the word, and having more fun.
My energy is back. My creativity is back. I feel inspired and fit again.
I’d been feeling off. A little run-down. A little tired. I didn’t have my normal motivation for my morning workouts and I couldn’t put my finger on why. I just knew that when it came time to train, the thing I’d considered the anchor for my day, I was distracted. Antsy. I felt like there was something else I wanted to do.
So I examined my day and zeroed in on my SOP.
Maybe I shouldn’t start my day with my workout. Maybe I should start it with relaxation and a brain dump to get all the creative ideas out of my head. Then work out.
So I thought, what if I flipped the order of what I’d been doing?
Now, let me back up for a second.
I’m turning 53 in two weeks, and what I’ve come to realize is that the things that worked for me at 35 may not work for me at 45, or 55 and beyond.
That’s life. That’s aging. No shame in it. We all adapt or die.
For a long time, I bought into the hustle-and-grind framework:
Up before the sun and lift weights at 5AM because that’s what winners do. One of the core tenets of this “grindset” is that suffering early became synonymous with discipline, commitment and success.
So I followed that SOP. And it worked for a long time, until it didn’t.
Over the past year, as I mentioned, my workouts weren’t great anymore. I didn’t look forward to them. I felt strained. I started picking up little injuries. By the time the day really started, I already felt tired, drained, and uninspired.
By racing out of bed I was missing quality time with my wife, Kate. Hard-earned time that we now had because we weren’t waking kids up, getting them fed and off to school. We’re empty nesters now.
I was feeling anxious and disconnected. I would somehow get up super early, lift, coach my clients and manage my business, and when it came time to write, I had nothing left creatively.
On paper, I was hitting my standards. In reality, I wasn’t firing on all cylinders, and I’d end every day frustrated and fatigued and it led to less intimate time with Kate, less enjoyable experiences together, and less energy for simply having fun.
So I changed the system – not the standards.
Now I want to share something that I read at the perfect time from Brad Stulberg’s new book, which I was lucky enough to get an advanced copy of:
“In the long-run, the people who succeed are the ones who want to live the lifestyle that precedes the results.
Stop asking, “What results do I want to have?”
Start asking, “What lifestyle do I want to live?”
It’s common to want results. It’s rare to want the lifestyle.”
Makes sense, right?
As for me, I still wake up at 5AM most mornings. But not to hustle, grind or dominate the day. I wake up early to give myself what I need.
I hydrate. I make great coffee. I get into an Epsom salt bath, open my laptop—yes, I have a bathtub desk—and I write. I pull from ideas I’ve already captured, and it flows.
When I’m done, I get back into bed. Kate and I have coffee together. We listen to music. We make love. We have no kids at home in the morning anymore, and that time together has become a powerful mood boost, creative boost, and something that’s genuinely good for our marriage.
I walk the dogs. I shower. I eat. I’m working by nine.
By three or four in the afternoon, my body wants to move. That’s when I train. I start with breathwork and mobility. I only strength train 2-3 days a week now.
I supplement with walking, rucking, yoga, intervals & boxing. And here’s the irony, nobody tells you this, but the gym is just as crowded at 5 p.m. as it is at 5 a.m.
Same two habits.
Same standards.
Different sequence.
Completely different outcome.
Now I feel better. I look better. I write better. I’m more relaxed, energized, productive, present, intentional and having more fun.
This isn’t an attack on discipline. And it’s not saying that hustle never works. There are absolutely times in your life, especially when you’re starting out or if you run a business, where you’ve got to throw out the schedule and just work your ass off. I know this. I’ve been there.
But at 53, I know there’s more than one way to succeed now. I know that you don’t have to buy into someone else’s routine, someone else’s values, someone else’s metrics or timing. In fact, you don’t even have to buy into your own old routine.
You can build a new operating system that fits your life now. That’s the key.
And it’s never too early, or too late, to change.
You just have to give yourself permission to evolve. To change the order. To build a model that fits your life, your season, and your priorities.
In Health,
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Greg Scheinman
Founder, Midlife Male
52. Husband. Father. Entrepreneur. Coach.
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