HOW TO SET GOALS IN MIDLIFE

by | Sep 26, 2021

What is the MidLife Male™?

He’s a guy @35-55 balancing work, life, family, health/fitness, finance/money, some style/fashion - trying to balance it all and live his best life possible without regret.
He’s about having both substance and style. About punching the bully in the mouth. About experiences over things. He’s about quality over quantity. He’s about learning and living. About trying, failing and ultimately succeeding. He’s about questioning things. He’s not trying to fit in or conform. He’s into iconic, classic, timeless style.

He’s about being a great father. About understanding that there are no things more valuable than time, health and family. He’s about knowing when enough is enough. He is about perseverance, discipline and having fun.
I talk to other midlife males on my podcast. I publish a newsletter about fitness, food, fashion, family, finance and fun - not to provide advice or come at this like I'm any kind of expert but rather that we’re all in this together, just trying to do our best, be our best and be happy, secure and comfortable in our own skin - Midlife Male is a lifestyle for "like-minded" guys just trying to figure it all out.
Just hoping to inspire, aspire and perspire together.

I hear from y’all about time management and goal setting more than just about anything.  It makes sense. Middle-age men still need to have goals. That’s non-negotiable if you want to keep growing and learning, yet too often our own personal goal-setting gets put on the back burner behind family, career, and many other obligations and choices. 

 

I focus on the 6 F’s (Family, Fitness, Finance, Food, Fashion & Fun) —not all get the same weight in a given year, but that’s my choice. It’s important to be aware of all areas of your life.

 

Time management is so hard for so many because you have no idea where your time is going.  You’re not in control of it.  It’s controlling you.  Make one of your goals, taking it back.  

 

Write everything down. I use Evernote so I don’t lose track of time, obligations, goals, and where I want to preserve time for myself or open it up to others and I can easily refer to my notes throughout the year. Maybe you’re an old-school paper-and-pen guy or just want to use your phone’s Notepad. Just write things down.

 

Share your thoughts, ideas, challenges, and goals with an “accountability partner”—or, you know…your actual partner or a trusted friend; you don’t have to give them a fancy title. It’s just important to not just keep this in your head; it’s too easy to run away from your goals when they are stuck up there.

 

I do this goal-setting exercise for me and me only. But I have bigger ideas in mind when I formulate some of those goals. Maybe I want to practice mental health so I’ll be a better husband and father. Maybe I invest in causes and people I believe in because it helps them influence the world. I take seriously what my legacy will be generations from now and goal-setting helps make that happen.

 

Having intention is the real value in creating this list each year. We don’t do this for accolades or extra credit. It’s personal. It’s planned. It’s purposeful and helps us avoid just floating through life reacting to everything swirling around. Every action creates a reaction.

Here are my daily non-negotiables: I’ve shared these before and I update them as needed.  Mine are and should be different from yours.

  1. Meditate, Practice gratitude, breathe
  2. Do the hard things first
  3. Revisit your endgame/goals daily
  4. Don’t fuck with things that don’t move the needle
  5. Make Family Time a priority
  6. Be intentional
  7. Exercise
  8. Ask questions: How can I serve you? Who do you know that can help me?
  9. Write for 30 minutes
  10. Read for 30 minutes
  11. Record one podcast per week
  12. Reach out to 3-5 clients, network, new people, and connect dots per week
Here’s how I goal-set and write shit down:
  1. Invest in 3-5 companies/brands I’m passionate about, led by people I love
  2. Focus on QUALITY clients/relationships over quantity
  3. Pre-Pay All Taxes
  4. Stay on a monthly budget
  5. Plan trips for weekends and year – one per qtr minimum.
  6. Take part in 3 new events/challenges
  7. Develop a uniform. Streamline wardrobe to reduce shopping / anxiety
  8. Home – invest in a few new pieces to enhance the quality of life
  9. Have Quarterly “goals” meetings with boys and Kate to help figure out our priorities and what’s important – camp, sports, education, travel, money…so that we can be better as a family
  10. Train functional, flexible, longevity-based fitness surrounded by like-minded people to live, perform and think better
  11. Limit/minimize distractions and negativity
  12. Read and listen more
  13. Meditate daily
  14. Have sex 2-3x per week
  15. Say NO to anything that does not contribute to achieving the above goals!

    Is it easy to accomplish any/all of this? No.

    Do I have days, weeks, and months where I get off track, feel overwhelmed, certain things take priority over others, I make mistakes, fail, or simply just don’t want to do the shit that I know very well I need to do in order to get closer to my goals? Of course, I do.

     

    The important thing is to keep moving forward.  Read, re-visit, re-read and get going again. 

     

    In Health –

    G

    Flip the switch on what it means to be middle-aged

    In the No B.S. Guide to Maximizing Midlife And Getting Back What Matters Most, I break down the three Midlife Male principles to maximizing middle age so you can take back some of the shit you’ve given up.